Crab and Lobsters, How to ruin thier day!

Cooking

Following the requests from several members, in fact one, I’ve incorporated this guide to cooking crabs and lobsters.
Step 1, Catch your crab/lobster (leave if carrying eggs, see size limits below)
Step 2, Make sure you’ve got a pan big enough.
Step 3, Fill the pan with enough water to cover the unsuspecting crustacean, throw in a handful of sea salt and put onto boil.
Step 4, Put the crab/lobster in the deep freeze along with a good bottle of white wine and leave for approx 30 mins or until the water boils. This avoids any undue resistance. I’ve tried other methods but have had to resort to mole gripping the lid in place on occasions!
Step 5, Put the crab into the boiling water for 15 minutes for the first pound and about 5 minutes for each extra pound. Remove from pan when cooked and leave to cool.

Dressing the Crab. The legs just pull off. To separate the body, turn the crab upside down and there is a distinct line where the legs join the body, press firmly round here and the body should split to allow the leg clump (for want of a better term) free. The dead mans fingers (feathery gills) are found round this area and should be removed. They aren’t poisonous so don’t be too paranoid. Round the mouth area you’ll find the gravel sack, discard this, everything else you can eat. The big tip is to cut the leg clump into quarters and pick out the meat, there is often more white meat in this bit than the claws. Please don’t take small (the legal limit is 4 ½ inches across the shell, but 6 seems fairer) or females, which can be identified by their broad tail flap. Dressing the Lobster. Pull the legs off and cut the lobster in half. The dead mans fingers are attached to the legs between the head section of shell and the body mass. Again discard these, the dark intestinal vein which runs into the tail and the gravel sack located near the mouth. Don’t throw away the green liver which is rite tasty. The minimum legal limit is 3 ½ inches from the eye sockets back to the end of the first section of shell. Again this is too small, 5 inches represents a reasonable size, I’m not sure how to tell females, I’m not that weird. Finally sit down and eat with the chilled wine.

As an aside I have it on good authority that crab infestations can be treated with flea powder, but I’m not sure how to apply it underwater????